President Romney and the New American Reality

By Dan Cooper


     I want to project a couple of months into an alternate reality. As unattractive and improbable as it may be, I believe it behooves us to take a serious look at what it could be like.
     On January 20, 2013, the 45th President of the United States is sworn into office by Chief Justice John Roberts. On January 23, President Mitt Romney confides to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu that Romney's oath of office included the assurance that he "would protect the independence of Israel at all costs."
     January 24: The president names his Cabinet appointees, and specifies three new posts, ambiguously titled, and filled by representatives of the national energy lobby, agribusiness, and the American Bankers Association.
     January 25: President Romney meets with Democratic Party leaders in Congress, assuring them that he will co-operate with them on key legislative issues if they will consent to major policy concessions. They agree, if he will agree to retain Obamacare. The president agrees.
     January 28: President Romney assures Republican leadership in Congress that he will sign whatever repeal of Obamacare they are able to bring to his desk.
     February 5: The president represents The United States in a key summit of World Leaders on the subject of Climate Change, at which time he signs a new accord on the subject. The details of the accord are widely publicized.
     February 8: The president assures Republican leadership in Congress that the media have distorted the actual content of the recently signed World Climate Accord, and that it actually stipulates that the United States is exempt from restriction to any binding commitment.
     February 11: President Romney signs a Presidential Memorandum suspending all government inspections and restrictions to energy companies based in the United States, who are actively seeking new oil reserves. The memorandum authorizes them to implement their own internal inspection programs.
     February 13: President Romney signs an executive order legalizing and encouraging the use of waterboarding as a means to extract information from detainees who were incarcerated "on suspicion of terroristic behaviors or associations."
     February 15: President Romney meets with representatives of the U.S. Global Change Research Program (USGCRP), assuring them that his administration will support their continuing research commitments and policy guidelines.
     February 19: The President signs into law a functional gutting of USGCRP, replacing it with a new department of Global Operative Policy and Informational Fact Formulation (GOPIFF).
     February 22: Romney signs a bill limiting funding for the Children's Health Insurance Program (CHIP), returning its funding limits back to levels prior to the Obama administration's expansion of that program.
     February 22: The president signs into law a defunding of Medicare, and the formulation of a replacement privately funded voucher system, RomneyCare, to take effect immediately.
     February 22: Romney signs into law an expansion of the United States military by 40,000 employees, and recommends an across the board increase of budgetary funding for the military by $1.3 billion "to re-build America's military strength and counteract the imminent threat of terrorism in the world."
     March 4: The president signs into law the Economic Recovery Plan and Tax Equalization Act (ERP-TEA), maintaining existing tax levels for Americans earning $600,000 or less, while reducing tax liabilities for those earning over that amount.
     March 5: Romney bows to the will of food industry giants, Sanderson Farms, Pilgrim's Pride, and Tyson Foods, by de-funding all federal government inspections of poultry farming in the U.S. This, the president claims, eliminates needless bureaucratic expense and streamlines the food industry when it is most in need of increasing its ability to meet the nation's rising demand for food. This action, he claims, will not only speed the food production process, but will reduce the cost to the consumer, helping to alleviate the difficult economic conditions "left to us by the previous administration."
     March 15: The president signs into law a budget to dramatically reduce the government programs that require for their maintenance a continued borrowing from nations like China. This new budget--known as the Big-Bird Budget--makes an across the board cut of 25 percent in funding for the federal agencies in charge of Commerce, Education, Agriculture, Labor, and Health and Human Services. Slightly less drastic cuts of 20 percent are mandated for Transportation, Veteran's Affairs, the Department of the Interior, the Federal Trade Commission, the Social Security Administration, and the Environmental Protection Agency. The budget for the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) is singled out for a deeper cut of 50 percent.
Funding is eliminated entirely for each of the following independent agencies and government corporations:

Corporation for Public Broadcasting
Advisory Council on Historic Preservation
National Endowment for the Arts
National Endowment for the Humanities
Corporation for National and Community Service
Election Assistance Commission
Federal Labor Relations Authority
National Science Foundation
Commission on Civil Rights

And that would just about wrap up Mitt Romney's first couple of months of work as President of the United States. He would be due for a three-week vacation at Camp David "with a few close friends," where he could plan the possible accomplishments of his next few months in office.

  This article cross-posted at OpEdNews.com and DailyKos.com